**Vicarious World Special** The Ultimate Superbowl Drinking Game... drink with caution

As of right now it is unclear who was working harder during the week leading up to the Superbowl, the two participating teams or Vicarious World’s team of wannabe writers. We have created (with some help from an associate) the most insane Superbowl drinking game ever. If you manage to get to Madonna’s halftime performance without puking your large intestine and/or dying, check yourself into rehab immediately. 

Also, VW does not promote drinking and driving, Jersey Campbell can tell you all about that. 

Here are the rules:

Offense

Situation	Drinks Required
Touchdown	One beer*
Play goes for 40 or more yards	Half a beer
TD on a play of 40 or more yds	Two beers
First down	One sip
3rd down conversion over 8 yds	Half a beer

Defense

Sack	Half a beer
Big hit (must be voted on by majority decision)	Half a beer
Tipped/defended pass	One sip
Tackle for loss for 5 or more yds	Half a beer
Safety	One beer

Special Teams

50 yd field goal	Half a beer
Blocked field goal or punt	Half a beer
Punt downed within the opposing team’s 5 yd line	Half a beer
Touchback	Two sips
Recovered onside kick	One beer

Turnovers

Fumble and offense recovers	Half a beer
Fumble and defense recovers	One beer
Pick six/ Fumble recovered by defense for TD	Two beers
Fourth down conversion attempt	Half a beer
Fourth down conversion attempt failed	One beer

Penalties

All penalties are two sips. If a penalty occurs on a play that requires drinking, the penalty renders the rule null and void. So if there's a big hit but it is penalized, only the penalty rule applies. Penalties trump all other rules.

Commercials

For the first commercial after each commercial break, everyone will bet on what company/brand will appear first. For instance, if one person chooses Doritos and another chooses Lay’s and the first commercial after the commercial break is advertising Doritos, everybody else in the room has to take a sip.

If two or more animals appear in a commercial take two sips

If a baby is standing and/or talking take two sips

Miscellaneous**

Camera cuts to a shot of Peyton Manning in the stands	Take a sip
Wes Welker catches a deep ball over the shoulder	Half a beer
Aaron Hernandez makes it rain	Half a beer
Victor Cruz does the salsa	Half a beer
QB runs for a first down and converts	Half a beer
Tim Tebow’s Jesus’  name is mentioned	Take a sip
Spectacular catches (must be voted on by a majority decision, here's an example. Anything less is not spectacular. If the entire rooms goes, "OOHHH," or says something like, "he didn't catch that," it's was probably spectacular. Even so, the catch must still be voted on.)	One beer
Kicker, punter, QB makes a tackle	Half a beer
Chad Ochocinco scores a TD	One beer
Referee/cameraman gets knocked over	Take a sip

Defensive player does the “eating them up” thingy after a big play

Two sips

First off, there will be situations where two rules will overlap. For example: a sack fumble that results in a touchdown. In that situation, the higher volume rule applies, so you will only be required to drink one beer. Another example for all you slow ppl that still don't get it: A 40-plus yard pass completion and run, then a fumble recovered by the defense. That will be one beer because a fumble recovery by the defense rule has a higher volume then a 40-plus yard play. Get it now? Good. If not, here's one more: a passed is tipped by a defensive linemen then intercepted. The tip is usually one sip, but because of the interception the play requires the beer to be finished. Basically, only one rule is allowed per play unless a miscellaneous situation happens.

*When we say "one beer" we really mean finish the beer in your hand at the time. If we say two beers it means finish the beer in your hand plus down another one. Have fun with that.

**For the miscellaneous rules: they always apply and are additional to any other situations that have played out on the field. For example: if Victor Cruz scores a touchdown and does the salsa. That is one beer for the TD and another half beer for the salsa. 

 

One last thing, to stand any chance of making it to the 2nd quarter, we suggest using small-sized plastic cups instead of being senseless and downing cans or bottles of beer for every TD scored. Use some common sense judgement people. 

If you have any questions, suggestions or comments (because we definitely missed some scenarios) about VW's Ultimate Superbowl Drinking Game link us @vicariousworld or email us at teambaady@gmail.com

Please, I know it's gonna be hard, but don't do anything stupid.