**Vicarious World's Best of the Month**: the May edition

Excuse us for being a little late this time around, our editor-in-chief was on his period, he can't operate when the blood is flowing through his vagina. Regardless, we've had the usual going on around here this past month, NYC Rob doing the damn thing, and likewise for KV Sart. Jersey Campbell has taken a leave of absence to scout the PLNL franchises for our upcoming season preview, it looks like he never wants to return. Sucks because the season started a month ago. He's about to get fired. Forget about him (and all the fellatio he's probably getting right now), let's focus on the dandies we've piled up in the month of May.

"Why always me?" A man confronts his greatness by Jersey Campbell

            Mario Balotelli is more than a man. In fact, if we were to call him a man there would be only one man- Balotelli- worthy of being a man. We mustn’t hold men to unattainable standards. For if the one man all men compared themselves to was Mario Balotelli, no man would ever be manly enough.