Showing posts with label marriage. Show all posts
Showing posts with label marriage. Show all posts

Friday, September 9, 2011

*Special to Vicarious World* Should you get married? Pt 2. Jersey Campbell and NYC Robert

If you missed Part 1 click here.
Apparently jumping over these
things means a lot

We continue with our friendly discussion on life, love, and jumping the broom.


Jersey Campbell:
Sorry that I didn't know about a 16th century wedding tradition from Wales. Shoulda caught up on my British history before having this conversation, that's my mistake. 
If you can't prove to me that true love exists then I have no reason to believe in it. It's simple logic- I cannot prove a negative claim, the positive must be confirmed. 
I'm just gonna keep throwing scenarios at you and watch you duck and dodge while never confronting. A happy marriage doesn't necessarily mean true love is involved. Maybe those two people are extremely compatible. Maybe one of them have mastered the art of seduction and can get any partner to love them. Maybe they "settled" and found that their partner isn't so bad after all. How are we supposed to know? There are so many people in this world- seven billion and counting- I find it hard to believe that only ONE can be right for you. It's totally possible that your personality and body type totally fit with another personality and body type so that you're predispositioned to have crazy, hormonally charged feelings towards them. It ain't some otherworldly connection that you were destined to have from you were born. Please. 
That's why it should be OK for one's partner to explore other options. If you limit yourself to one person for your whole life you'll never know what else is out there. The smart consumer shops around before settling on a purchase and even then they always keep the receipt. The problem is people aren't products and emotions are easily hurt, I'll give you that. But my point is that no one partner is perfect, and the dissatisfaction will always arise. Whether you can handle it is based not on love, but a crapload of other emotions and rationales that we have lazily (or brilliantly, depending on your opinion) defined as love. 
I'm also curious to know your sentiments on homos (fuck off, that's not a derogatory term. If you're a man and you only like men you're a homo. If you're a woman and you only like woman you're a homo. It's a scientific term. That's like telling me I can't call someone from Argentina an Argentinian.) and bis. But I fear that we'd be overstepping the parameters of this discussion. Maybe another time brother.


NYC Robert:
You don’t want to believe then fine, but tell me how many people believe in things they can’t prove?  If you ask me, I’d say lots actually. One main belief is God. How many people can say that they’ve actually seen him? Not a lot, but yet millions believe in his existence. So it’s not really farfetched to believe true love and marriage can work. Why? Because not many people know marriages that are perfect, but yet it is said that everyone has a true love. Isn’t it a bit mysterious that that saying is still going around today? I think so. If you want to be a wild man and assume it doesn’t exist then fine, do that.  Ask yourself this though- have you tried to find true love, or do you just assume it’s not possible?


If you’re fine with your significant other dating others then OK. But I don’t think you two are in an actual relationship, and according to you what’s the point of people titling their relationship, by saying we’re dating, serious, or engaged? In the end that person will get you so annoyed and frustrated you won’t want to be around them. It’s kind of interesting that you think this way. It’s very similar to the book of Solomon and his wise thinking of not laying with various women for moments of pleasure, or keeping their company just for mere enjoyment. Because in the end they don't help you and you probably don't care about them.  So with the thought of Solomon, if you want to explore then explore, but you shouldn’t need a relationship to tell you you’re not with the right person.  Instead, you should meet people without a relationship, and that will guide you to know what you want in, and from a relationship.


You also mention homos, why? I don’t know. We aren’t discussing who should get married, we're discussing if we need to get married. Love is love, it’s not my place to judge who should, or shouldn’t be married. And as I mentioned before if you believe that there is a person out there for you go and find them. Don’t be a person who thinks financial stability will settle everything. True happiness doesn’t need to be rich. In fact I’d take a mediocre life, a house, a wife, children, and Love over being extremely rich and miserable any day of the week.   

*Special to Vicarious World* A friendly discussion: Should you get married? Pt I. Jersey Campbell and NYC Robert


Today we bring to you a Vicarious World Special: Should you get married? 

Two of our writers, Jersey Campbell and NYC Robert, rip each other apart trying to get to the bottom of this not-so-important question. None of them propose to be experts on marriage (sorry Rob, I take that back) but we thought it would be fun to see where this discussion would take them. 

Read and enjoy. And leave a comment or two, we'd like to see what other people think about this. 


Jersey Campbell: 
Honesty is the best policy, but evidently dishonesty is in a close second. I'll admit I disagree with about 100% of what you say in your posts and I can no longer sit aside and let you ramble on about relationships and not air my opinions. This will be the first and last time I will write about relationships extensively on this blog. 
Nobody "needs" to get married. Aside from the extensive legal and psychological effects of being legally bound to your partner marriage is not essential. If you love someone why do you need the church or the state to confirm it? Besides, getting married is like handcuffing your life to someone else, and we already know how generally undependable people are. Then if things don't work out you gotta get your lawyer involved and go through the whole divorce process, who wants to do all that?
I'm not anti-relationship or anti-marriage, I just think we should think long and hard before you take that oath to be with this person for the rest of your life. Your LIFE. I don't care if their a 20, 80, 55, 12.93, 79 1/2, or 101. Even if you're 100 percent sure that this is the one (and even if you are sure, you're probably wrong) there is a chance that you might not be the one for them. I don't even believe that we have "soulmates." That's like Plato rambling on about perfect beauty and perfect justice. That shit don't exist. Let's not kid ourselves. 


NYC Robert:                                                                                                                                         Do we need to get married? Many people, in fact, lots of people say “NO." They don’t understand the need to get married or to find their true soul mate. Some don’t think it even exists. Well Mr. Campbell, I’m here to tell you that people should get married, and that everyone- yes everyone- has a soul mate.


How many people actually venture to find their true soul mate? If you ask me? not too many. Too many people settle for what’s around them. For example going to a bar, club, church, library, coffee shop, or any other place that suites what they like, or think they like, nearby. What if your true soul mate was in another town, state, or country? I feel that a major problem with people finding true love is the society we live in. Our society is based on capital. As a result people get so wound up in their careers, and not living life, exploring the world, or taking the time to find true love.  I also know in this world now it’s hard for anyone to say I’m going out to find true love and just drop everything on a wimb.


It’s obvious by now that finding true love isn’t easy, but it is possible. Well if you believe that then you’ve probably heard this saying too, “Nothing is easy.” If you really want to find true love then do it. Don’t settle for anyone just cause, because in the end you’re going to be unhappy with yourself, life, and have hatred towards the other person.


I know finding your true soul mate isn’t the act of jumping the broom. However, I do feel that when you find that person, your other half, then getting married wont’ feel like an obligation. So don’t bitch and moan that marriage doesn’t work when you seek enjoyment from the same type of people, and you don’t even feel that isn’t your true soul mate.