This question dawned on me when I had asked a girl (I don't know her very well, but it seemed like we share common interest), "Would she like to get some lunch?" At the time, she knew enough about me to say that it wouldn’t be appropriate, solely because I am in a relationship. Though I had a feeling that would be her answer, I didn’t quite understand. She went on and on and simply concluded that it wouldn’t be right. Still, I didn’t understand. I then turned the scenario around, and asked her if she has male friends. Turns out, she does. I dug a bit deeper, "What's the difference between them and me?"After we discussed it for a while longer I realized she wasn’t saying much, just repeating herself. She also wasn’t stating much other then, "Because you're in a relationship."
However, my argument is that if I have no intentions to pursue her and she has no intentions to pursue me, what’s the big deal? Unless, however, she does have such intentions, which then would make her interested in me. (Why not just say that? It’s better than beating around the bush.)
I have concluded that it is the type of anxiety one feels towards another that will alter how they behave. For instance, a gentleman/lady is shopping. While out they are approached by a salesperson. Neither of them finds the the other interesting. After a few minutes this gentlemen/lady meet a different salesperson. This time, however, the person is interesting to them. Their behavior is now altered. They’re more concerned about appearance, physical features, what they’re saying, and maybe how to get in contact with this person in the future (call it what you want but we all do this sub-consciously).
Voice your opinion! Let me know what you think. (Don’t you have common interests with your friends?)