Wednesday, December 28, 2011

The Girl He Never Had-Part 1 First outing by NYC Robert

Heading to an outing to meet up with a new acquaintance, Steven had jitters. Though the outing was no more than just that, he was unsure of what to say, or how to act. Steven even began to wonder if his attire was appropriate enough. He had on casual black shoes, dark blue jeans, and a fitted t-shirt; and although many women were checking him out on the metro, Steven paid them no attention. Instead, he was just focused on the outing with Alexis.

Sunday, December 18, 2011

Vicarious World's NBA Western Conference Season Preview Pt II: How the west was won by Jersey Campbell

So we've rundown the lottery teams, now we can dive into the playoff teams.

Vicarious World's NBA Western Conference Season Preview Pt I: good luck in the lottery by Jersey Campbell

When I saw preseason basketball on NBATV last Friday night (76ers @ Pistons) I immediately had to change my boxers. Not only did the lockout make me yearn for professional basketball, it also made me realize that the season should start on Christmas every year. Players have long been clamoring for a shorter regular season, but it will never happen because, you know, revenue and shit. I’ve never been so hype for a game featuring Ben Gordon, Greg Monroe, Andre Iguodala, and Jrue Holiday. And we learned why the number 8 means so much to Ben Gordon. Anyways, let’s get down to this NBA 2011-2012 season preview.

We will be breaking down each team in the NBA and ranking them based on how good we think they will be this season, not necessarily where they will finish in the standings. NBA sources tell us it’s gonna be a fluky season this year. 

Saturday, December 17, 2011


            As silly as it may sound to some, I’m excited for the NBA season to begin.  I think we could all use a little distraction in our lives, and the NBA can provide that distraction in spades.  NBA basketball is one of the few sporting platforms that is exciting no matter what team is playing; constant floor pounding action and fan cheering fun.  Now that I’ve gotten my inner-childlike sports fan out, let’s take a look at how the NBA East is shaping up for the start of this season.

Thursday, December 15, 2011

Jersey Campbell's notebook ramblings I

It was only a couple weeks ago that I was clamoring for a revamp of our democratic principles. Today, I have an example of why our power to the people model is inherently unfair. Albeit a trivial example.

OK, here's the scenario. I am the proud commissioner of a fantasy basketball league (Proud commissioner? Haha. Is the fantasy league my child?). There is a heated argument going on right now over weekly vs. daily roster alterations. Some owners want their rosters to be available for daily changes, others don't. What is a commissioner to do?

Wednesday, December 14, 2011

Jersey Campbell's Quote of the Day: the Don Draper edition

For a character that asks, "What do you want me to say?" for what seems like every Mad Men episode, Don Draper sure knows how to string some words together to create insightful statements and can't-miss advertising proposals. 

As you can see, today's quote of the day comes to us from Mad Men's Don Draper, a man who always has something to say. Unless he literally asks what he should say.

“When a man walks into a room, he brings his whole life with him. He has a million reasons for being anywhere, just ask him. If you listen, he’ll tell you how he got there. How he forgot where he was going, and that he woke up. If you listen, he’ll tell you about the time he thought he was an angel or dreamt of being perfect. And then he’ll smile with wisdom, content that he realized the world isn’t perfect. We’re flawed, because we want so much more. We’re ruined, because we get these things, and wish for what we had.”

Sunday, December 11, 2011

Inside Out by K.V. Sart

The beard on my face,
Is just a trace,
Of the man I am,
Judged like a fan,
Of Communism and Anarchy,
As once was Darwinism and Russian royalty.

Neurotic thoughts rule the mind,
But not the mouth,
We are espoused,
To outcast the last of the original and different,
In contrast to everything we have been taught,
Seen, learned, discovered, and thought.

The mind has been reserved,
For science and math so we can learn,
The intricacies of space and time
Which leaves undefined,
What we cannot see,
What is difficult to know.
It is a tiny window,
Through which we observe the world,
Until we accept the possibility,
That anything is possible,
That we can right our wrongs,
With love to all,
And acceptance for those individually,
Who think and do differently,
And don’t look down on your narrow affinities,

Dating: Has texting gone too far? by NYC Robert

Texting has changed the spectrum of communication completely. It's a quick and easy way to tell someone something, and has it's own language. From acronym's to facial expressions, many different things can be said in a text.

Friday, December 9, 2011

Vicarious World's Premier League All Name Squad by Jersey Campbell

I am what most people would call a football fanatic. No, not stop-start-stop-stop-stop-commercial-kickoff-commercial-start-stop-punt football. We're talking about real football here. The one where your foot is the medium by which the footballer expresses his/herself. The beautiful game that flows like a stream in the forest. The game of unparalleled fan passion and Wayne Rooney hair transplants. The game of individual moments of artistic brilliance and collective efforts only possible through telepathic means. 

Today I bring to you my all-name squad. Using only objective analysis, I have created a foolproof formula that will spit out the most majestic monikers the EPL has to offer. In the case of two or more names being equally awesome, the tiebreaker will be form and ability. On to the selections. (Clubs in parenthesis)

Tuesday, December 6, 2011

Happiness Is by K.V. Sart

Happiness is
            being lost in conversation,
Happiness is
            working a task to completion,
Happiness is
            not wanting more,
Happiness is
Happiness is
            regarding the past without embarrassment,
Happiness is
            not worrying about the future,
Happiness is
            being content in the web of now,
Happiness is
            being present,
Happiness is
            nothing without pain,
Happiness is
            the absence of pain,
Happiness is
            relative to pain,
Happiness is
            always fleeting.

Sunday, December 4, 2011

Sport: Mind Games by NYC Robert

I'm looking into the tunnel, but what's really at the end of it? Is it fans with tasty refreshments, or is it water and Gatorade filling the sidelines? Is it insanely loud spectators cheering for me or for another player? Or is it a marked off field with field goal posts at each end? What will be my destiny in the next sixty minutes? Will it be fame, or glory? Will I be famous for fumbling the ball, missing a big catch, or not shaking defenders off? Will I walk off the field with my head high in victory? Penciling out the endless possibilities I feel they still have no affect on what I am about to do. Instead, they’re just mere imagines of my real opponent. It's apparent if I beat my mind, I can beat anyone. Game Over! 

Friday, December 2, 2011

Zen Poetry not by K.V. Sart

Mind at Peace
When the mind is at peace,
the world too is at peace.
Nothing real, nothing absent.
Not holding on to reality,
not getting stuck in the void,
you are neither holy or wise, just
an ordinary fellow who has completed his work.
P'ang Yün ( Hõ Un) (The Enlightened Heart 34)

PLNL: Reactions from the Jonnie Gee signing by Jersey Campbell

Some crazy shit has gone down in the XXX League sending vitriolic reverberations and reactions around its umbrella association, the Professional Ladies of the Night League (PLNL). The crazy shit I’m referring to is the signing of a male ho from Long Island, New York named Jonnie Gee to the Newark Tricks and Hoes. Newarks’s (which uses the name “Newark” because it sounds like “New York”) new team owner/pimp Gangsta n shit has shocked the world of professional prostitution with his first roster move. It is a signing totally unprecedented. The rulebook does not explicitly state that a man cannot compete in the PLNL, but most of the hoes will tell you it was carved in stone in the unwritten rulebook. 

Jonnie Gee will be a member of the practice squad, training with the team and possibly getting a couple starts on the XXX League tour.

Rather than go through the details myself, I’ve written down a few of the noteworthy comments from players/hoes, coaches, and executives/pimps.

Wednesday, November 30, 2011

Broken Phone Calls By K.V. Sart

Not the words that are said,
but the words that are not said,
or the ones I cannot say,
but have tried many times,
and at times have come close to saying,
to the point where she knows the words that I am not saying
and knows what these words would mean and do mean.

*Vicarious World's Best of the Month*: the November edition

Another month has come and gone. The leaves have turned, the children are frolicking through nature's debris, Black Friday has become no different then a crackhead gathering, and Vicarious World's team of wannabe writers continue to deliver. This month features the debut of the great Lebron Hawk-Ali, our relationship guru pens another NC-17 rated poem, and a young man broadcasts his new Manchester mancrush. Brothers and Sisters we present to you Vicarious World's Best of the Month. Read... and be merry.

Tuesday, November 29, 2011

Lebron Hawk-Ali's notebook ramblings II

From mind to technology I breathe fire into the waters of thought; what you read before u is the vapor.
Today's focus will b on the appalling yet revealing police tactics exercised domestically in the U.S. regarding civic unrest; particularly in relation to the Occupy Wall Street movement. Again, I must stress the term civic. A state, ideally, is to remain in response to the needs, desires, and inquiries of the mass populace; being an extension of the main civic body. Following this logic, there should exist no laws that have not been comprehended, discussed, and voted on by the the people, which from this point on I will refer to as the body politic.

notebook ramblings by K.V. Sart

On The American Dream

          Hunter S. Thompson went searching for the American Dream in Las Vegas, but all he found was a fear and loathing.  He pronounced the American Dream officially dead; estimated time of death: the 1950’s.
            I do not agree with Dr. Duke's conclusion.  Rather, it seems the American Dream has mutated into an untenable form.  So what happened to the American Dream?  What made the American Dream so great in the first place, and what did it mean when it was great?

Lebron Hawk-Ali's notebook ramblings I

notepad ramblings is Vicarious World's official journal. Whenever we feel the need to express ourselves through literature in short bursts, we come to the journal and release our thoughts. 

Should we reevaluate our economic principles? Should morality be infused into economics?
Damn, a thought, considering our economic system, do you ever consider an improved ethic when transacting business?

Monday, November 28, 2011

What attracts you? by NYC Robert

Have you ever thought about what attracts you the most to someone you view as your potential significant other?

What attracts me: I'm attracted to women who play hard to get but, at the same time, let's me know she's interested. To me that's a turn on. Not just because it's a challenge, which I like, but also because I know she's not an open book. The mere fact that I cannot read her troubles me(I can read just about everyone women in seconds). I then become curious to find out more, and although she may be stunningly attractive it doesn't matter. Just the fact that she's curious makes me want to be Inspector Gadget with her.

Share what attracts you, I'd like to read it.

Suicide Me by Jersey Campbell

Everyone I know goes about their lives believing with all conviction that life is preferable to death. Sure, life is great if you own a yacht and a PLNL franchise, but those of us less fortunate it ain’t so rosy. What makes life better than death? Until someone can explain what death is like we have no business making definite statements about the matter. 

Wednesday, November 23, 2011

Dating Anxiety- Before You Know Them by NYC Robert

The feeling of liking someone. Wanting to tell them how you feel about them. You become so worked up

On Freedom Pt II: the Shackles of Democracy by Jersey Campbell

Jersey Campbell apologizes for being a week late with this post. But he's not getting paid or anything so who cares right? 
It is strongly recommended that you read Pt. I before tackling the conclusion.
                So where does all this talk of cause and effect and everything effecting everything take us? Even if we are not willing to concede the nonexistence of freedom, we can still hold on to the philosophy of freedom by embracing a democracy fundamentally opposed to the government we have now. (I trust we all know that America is not a democracy, but a representative republic.)

Tuesday, November 22, 2011

*Vicarious World Special*- Democracy in the Workplace by Lebron Hawk-Ali

 Vicarious World would like to introduce Lebron Hawk-Ali. In a world of upstanding individuals, Mr. Hawk-Ali stands the tallest. He will be contributing to VW from time to time, discussing his thoughts on things we should all take into consideration. In a previous existence, contemporaries would describe him as a revolutionary... then he got locked up for tax evasion and was handed the death penalty. You live, you die, you are reincarnated, then you live again.
His first post dissects hegemonic business hierarchies and the stripping down of critical thought required to maintain one's job. Read... and be exposed.

There is often much verbiage regarding the morality of employees under the tutelage of fortune 500 companies. These are times of misfortune, or a bear market if one is familiar with economists' vocabulary. As a result, the globalist economy and it's function of sustaining the concentration of wealth at the expense of employees, has become "shop talk" once again; civic disscussion has been reignited.

Sunday, November 20, 2011

Rough Economy: How to keep your relationship by NYC Robert

The other day while listening to z100, radio station, the host was talking to an artist about his latest song. It's about the difficulties for relationships in these tough economic times.Although I didn't hear the song the interview was insightful. I'm sure those ofyou in relationships now can agree that money is tight and the things that you twouse to do you probably can't do as much, or not even at all anymore. Ending yourrelationship because of the economy would be foolish, I think, so I've put togethersome ideas that can help you two get through this economical rough patch.

Saturday, November 19, 2011

Stop! Consuming So Much Saturated Fat by NYC Robert

Our nation is in an epidemic with regards to our health.  I’m really not much of a sugar-coater so I’ll tell you the things they don’t. Before I begin I have to pick an area because there’s way too much to put in one post… After pondering I’ve got it. Saturated fat, have you heard of it? I’m sure many of you have. But do you know why it is bad for you?

Wednesday, November 16, 2011

A Sad Rant By NYC Robert

Yesterday was my twenty-third birthday, but when I woke up I was sad. Sad because of the things that are existent in my life, and for the first time in a while, I felt like crying. My father has Parkinson's, and my mom has a nerve imbalance. I feel in the blink of an eye I can lose the ones who love me the most.

I've always been tough, and fierce; and I've always had the ball in my hand, but I don't feel that way anymore. Love is a strong thing; I now know why it's used against people in certain situations. But I feel broken with no control. I've been sad and thinking of these things for some time now. I've also been asking myself why I don’t feel like my usual self, I'm young right? I guess I'm stuck in this old mind. In a way I still think God is existent. How else would I have the notion to feel the love for someone (family and friends) if not? Although I wrote that doesn't take away the pain I feel inside. My eyes will still water, and I'll still feel helpless.

I think about the future. What may happen to my sisters, and me? Where will we all end up? I mean time moves so damn fast. Before you know it I'll be thirty with a kid, and the cycle has started again. But this notion I have inside of me, where will it go?  

Tuesday, November 15, 2011

PLNL: Q and A with league commish Wilfred Samson- an interview conducted by Jersey Campbell

In the first installment of Vicarious World's PLNL Q and A series our very own Jersey Campbell interviews one of the luckiest men in sports entertainment, the one and only Commissioner Wilfred Samson of the Professional Ladies of the Night League. The following Q and A probes Commissioner Samson on the state of competitive prostitution, prospective franchises in Vegas, and the issue (or non-issue) of hoes thinking they are worth more then what their salary suggests. Read... and be informed.

Jersey Campbell: First off, we’d like to thank you for taking the time out to answer our questions.

Commissioner Samson: Well Jersey, this is a part of my job, and I’d be remiss if we never had a conversation, no?

JC: Iight cool. So, you’ve been commish for 17 years now, why don’t you tell us about some the challenges you’ve faced as the head of the PLNL?

Monday, November 14, 2011

Empty Reverb by K.V. Sart

The sound from the television echoes and reverbs in the room.  Not many things here.  Not many things to kill the sound, to absorb the echo.  The echo of the television or the computer speakers, not the echo of live voices, but sometimes the pounding of the computer keyboard.  The space is nice to look at but is difficult to be in.  A claustrophobic feeling of open space, of being completely contained in the emptiness of the thing.  Just me in here, and a few other things.

Sunday, November 13, 2011

A Kiss With No Meaning By NYC Robert

What’s a kiss with no meaning, sweet lady? To me there’s no fire, no passion, or pleasure. A kiss with no meaning has no body, no life itself. It’s lifeless, the kiss.

Better Than a Forehead Kiss. By NYC Robert

I want to touch and caress her. I want to make her feel angelically aroused.

Yes that’s the feeling. My hand cupped around her neck, holding her close, so close our lips meet. As we slowly and gently share a bond; her hands come around my neck, and mine around hers. I however, will not stop there. I continue to move my hands lower and lower, but not fast, instead in a steady caressing pace. 

Friday, November 11, 2011

Single Men Who Have Friends That Are In Relationships. By NYC Robert

How many guys,who are in a relationship, or married, hear from their single male friends that you're allowing your women to control you, or “being pussy whipped." I've heard it many times. At first, I thought I was pussy whipped, but I didn't want to be. I wanted, of course, to be masculine, and firm. But as my relationship grew I discovered that I wasn't being pussy whipped. I just wanted to be with my girl. 

Jersey Campbell's video of the day: its a celebration bitches


While all you Americans are watching stop and start "football" (seriously, why is it called football?) there are billions- AND BILLIONS!!- of real football fans enjoying the beautiful game in all its glory.

Today I present to you just one of the many reasons why football is better than American football. Ever since the NFL banned props and choreography in TD celebrations (it's about the Shield, not you brand-less wide receivers clamoring for attention), America's major sports have lacked any creative showboating that kids can mimic after Moss'ing a defender in the end zone. I'm not the only one with a case of nostalgia for the days when Ocho Cinco would mock the NFL by pleading not to be fined. Or when Joe Horn calls his mother to thank her for all she's done after digging out a flip cell phone from under the goalposts. Or when T.O. grabs a couple of pom poms and breaks it down in the end zone. At least we have Aaron Hernandez making it rain on 'em defenses every week as our severly watered down TD entertainment.

Wednesday, November 9, 2011

On Freedom Pt I: Slaves of Circumstance by Jersey Campbell

Here is Pt. II
                I don’t know what freedom is. You don’t either, don’t kid yourself. We’re talking about ultimate platonic freedom. Total uninhibited actions. We have never seen freedom and I’ll bet we will never see freedom. Freedom is one of those concepts we love to talk about and throw around in conversation like we know what it is, kinda like objectivity. 

                My question is how can we possibly be free when there is so much going on around us totally out of our control? Freedom stops precisely where circumstance begins, and we can’t escape circumstance. A man may want to run along the shoreline of a beach but that’s never happening if he has no legs. A president may want to run for a third term but the 22nd Amendment forbids it. A 15-year-old girl may be in love with a 35-year-old man but her lover would face rape charges at the end of the day. Freedom of action will always be checked by the conditions that a person finds themselves in.

Thursday, November 3, 2011

Jersey Campbell's Quote of the Day: the Sufi edition

Hello boys and girls. Today's quote of the day comes to us from Jalāl ad-Dīn Muḥammad Rūmī, more commonly known as Rumi.
He was a 13th century poet, jurist, theologian, and Sufi mystic from the Persian province of Balkh (present day Afghanistan).
While I may not be a believer myself, I will always respect individuals who genuinely search for truth and the divine. Without further ado, here is the quote of the day: 

"I tried to find Him on the Christian cross, but He was not there; I went to the temple of the Hindus and to the old pagodas, but I could not find a trace of Him anywhere. I searched on the mountains and in the valleys, but neither in the heights nor in the depths was I able to find Him. I went to the Kaaba in Mecca, but He was not there either. I questioned the scholars and philosophers, but He was beyond their understanding. I then looked into my heart, and it was there where He dwelled that I saw Him; He was nowhere else to be found."

Tuesday, November 1, 2011

"Why always me?" A man confronts his greatness by Jersey Campbell

            Mario Balotelli is more than a man. In fact, if we were to call him a man there would be only one man- Balotelli- worthy of being a man. We mustn’t hold men to unattainable standards. For if the one man all men compared themselves to was Mario Balotelli, no man would ever be manly enough. 

Monday, October 31, 2011

**Vicarious World's Best of the Month**- The Oct-boner* entries

*Oct-boner refers to the frenzy experienced by Jersey Campbell during post-season baseball.

At the conclusion of every month Vicarious World's team of (wannabe) writers comes up with a totally arbitrary list of our top blog posts during that time. Somehow, someway, the wonderful people of Vicarious World have made it through a second month without being arrested and/or attacked by a gang of feminists. This month, we've got a wide range of articles that covers everything from moving in day at a prestigious SUNY school to a man who gave everything he had in the name of saving people he'd never meet. Will we be back next month? Oh, who knows? Let's just relax and enjoy the best Vicarious World has to offer for this month. Read... and be merry.

Sunday, October 30, 2011

Domestic Abuse: Why do they stay? by NYC Robert

"Why are you here? I don't even care about you! You’re that…that stuff at the bottom of my shoes after I accidentally step in a pile of dog crap. Yeah…that. That's what you are!"

How would you feel if your significant other said that to you? Probably like shit, but are hurtful things like that always said or done so blatantly? Are you the person who says these hurtful things, if so, why?

Wednesday, October 26, 2011

Billion Dollar Pimps, Million Dollar Hoes by Jersey Campbell

      We’re in the thick of one of the best World Series of recent memory, NCAA Football is kicking into gear, and NFL Football still dominates the first half hour of SportsCenter. Nobody really misses basketball.

                  Its day whatever of the NBA lockout, and the Billion Dollar Pimps are still bickering with the Million Dollar Hoes. The hoes want to keep more of their hard earned money and the pimps want to retain more of the money they’ve invested in their franchises. Everybody is slapping their egos around and crying foul play by the other side. Let’s toss aside notions of right and wrong and look at these selfish parties as they are. Referring to them as prostitutes may be insincere but that’s exactly what it is. Kinda.

Monday, October 24, 2011

A peek inside the soul of a soulless man Pt. III: Reality Reconstruction by Jersey Campbell

From when I was a little tyke running from the girls with the cooties in the schoolyard my reality was developing itself. Well it was even before then, from when I was born in North Shore hospital and when my cute Martian-sized forehead began taking in this whole new world around him; my reality was beginning to take shape. I said that my reality was developing itself, what I meant to say was my reality was developing in virtue of the people and the things that surrounded me. I was incapable of developing anything during that time of my life with the exception of some feces in my diaper.

Saturday, October 22, 2011

Stop Hating Chick! by NYC Robert

The other day, while at work, I was having lunch with a co-worker (Allister) when a female friend (didn’t catch her name) of his walked in. We all
chatted for a while, and then another co-worker (Trigay) walked in. At that time, the other female co-worker was leaving so we said our goodbyes, but Trigay mumbled “skizzer."  I later asked Trigay why she had said that, and she corrected me and told me that it wasn’t directed towards that co-worker. Instead, it was directed towards Allister.  A bit puzzled, I asked her why do females hate on girls when there isn't really anything to hate on. Trigay had a lot to say, but it honestly wasn’t rocket science.

Thursday, October 20, 2011

PLNL: El Capitan and the incompetence of the Putas by Jersey Campbell

For our second feature on the news and notes of the Professional Ladies of the Night League, Jersey Campbell takes a look at the Puerto Rican Putas- a franchise that has been stuck in the XXX League for over two decades- and the man solely responsible for their most recent failures. 

It’s been 24 years since the Puerto Rican Putas have seen the perverse glory of the Playboy Club and an even more mystifying 15 years since they’ve been in the top two of the XXX League. For a region with that much talent, continuous underachievement seems devastatingly puzzling.

Tuesday, October 18, 2011

PLNL: And the Blow Goes On by Jersey Campbell

Vicarious World now has the exclusive reporting rights to the Professional Ladies of the Night League. We are extremely pleased and honored to be the only news outlet worthy enough to cover the PLNL. There will be many stories and updates on the PLNL along with the pimps and hoes that the league is famous for. For our first article detailing the comings and goings of the PLNL our very own Jersey Campbell writes a mini-synopsis of the trophy winning Chicago Blow franchise.  Read, and be merry. 

A Pimp Named Slickback doesn’t putHomies ova Hoes,” but everything else is fair game. The 2011 Professional Ladies of the Night League Champions Chicago Blow are through resting on their laurels, and A Pimp Named Slickback continues to work 15-hour work days through the off-season. 

Sunday, October 16, 2011

A Story by K.V. Sart

            This is a story.  It is a short story.  There are characters.  The antagonist and protagonist are both relatable and this creates conflict.  The question of justice causes disagreement. 
            The description is thorough but not overdone.  An imaginative reader is necessary.  The style is unique but understandable.  The form follows the plot.
            The narration does not overextend.  Perspective stays consistent within the narration.  The timing and tenses make sense.  The dialogue is not filler.  When the characters talk, it is important to the plot.
            The characters seem real, though they are not.  The internal logic is valid, though externally it may not be.  The sequence of events is surprising, but believable.
            It ends at precisely the right moment.

The Possible Effects of Teen Pregnancies by NYC Robert

Last week I read Real talk: Let’s Talk About Teen Sex” by Demetria L. Lucas. After reading I thought about how teen pregnancy can lead to problems in other aspects of life. It really isn't rocket science as to how I puzzled these factors together. They include health risks such as obesity, coronary heart disease, diabetes, and sedentary lifestyle, which is soon to be the number one killer. There are also behavioral factors, among others, but for now I’ll leave it general; mainly because I don't want to make this too long. So, if you’re asking how teen pregnancy can effect those things, here’s how. 

Friday, October 14, 2011

My Humiliation by Kelly Sagina

 “Humiliation involves a triangle: (1) the victim, (2) the abuser and (3) the witness. The humiliated person may also behold her own degradation, or may imagine someone else, in the future, watching it or hearing about it. This is what Wayne Koestenbaum thinks about humiliation.

Wednesday, October 12, 2011

Jersey Campbell's "How is a nigga gonna borrow a fry?" of the day- The DUI edition

I didn’t think I would have to come back with one of these so soon. Alas, here we are, and niggas still act like fries can be borrowed
"I seen the hatred in his eyes the first time I walked in the class. All he saw when he looked at me was a black nigger."
I was in an unfortunate incident a month ago and now the county is trying to fuck their way up my ass and into my small intestine. I don’t know if you’ve ever been ass fucked before but it really hurts.

Monday, October 10, 2011

*Vicarious World Special*- Roads to Freedom

Vicarious World would like to present the critically acclaimed pilot of the UAlbany pseudo reality show, "Roads to Freedom." Directed and produced by Daquan "DJ iChunez" Stukes, it features Vicarious World writer Jersey Campbell (identified by his slave name, Cory A. Washington). Unfortunately, we were only able to finish one episode. And here it is. Watch, and be merry.
Roads to Freedom- episode 1 (it's second video listed on the right)

Saturday, October 8, 2011

What type of questions should you ask on a date? by NYC Robert

Going on a date should be exciting, fun, and interesting. However, sometimes you may not ask the right questions. The right questions are opened-ended. They allow for conversation; and as a result you learn more about the other person. What you don’t want to do is ask closed-ended questions because they don’t allow for conversation. They’re more abrupt and lead to short conversation. These include questions like: what do you do for a living? Do you like fruits? Do you like the beach? Each one of those questions could be answered with a single statement, or a few words; and that is not what you want if you’re interested in someone. A date is to find out more about how someone thinks, behaves, and responds to certain things you do, and say. So, if you aren’t very good at asking opened-ended question here are some you can use. These will also help you make your own.

Jersey Campbell's "How is a nigga gonna borrow a fry?" of the day

Vicarious World would like to introduce you to Jersey Campbell’s newest running gimmick, “How is a nigga gonna borrow a fry?”

I am a man of many gimmicks; this may be my favorite one yet. If you aren’t familiar with the comic strip-turned- cartoon The Boondocks, now is the time for acquaintance. I'll save the 1,000 word explanation and provide you with a link to the episode of note at the end of this post. “How is a nigga gonna borrow a fry?” will tackle happenings, stories and policies that make no sense but are taken for granted. Everybody knows it’s impossible to “borrow” any type of food, yet people still ask right? It’s important to note that amid this outrageous question is an aspect even more ridiculous than the question itself. You’ll know what I’m talking about when you see the video.

Wednesday, October 5, 2011

Career Fair Crashers by Jersey Campbell

NYC Rob and I looking like businessmen or something

I've been out of school for four-plus months and still haven't found a job yet. Yes, I know, Vicarious World is my job. But people tell me I should be looking for a job that could put some money in my pockets. So when NYC Robert told me about a local career fair going on today I dusted off my shirt and tie and resurrected my dress shoes for the occasion.

Monday, October 3, 2011

*Vicarious World Special*- Is It Love? by Kelly Sagina

Vicarious World would like to introduce Kelly Sagina. Kelly likes long walks on the beach and can often be found riding her bike to and from the Pearly Gates of Heaven. Michelle Obama likes to think that she stole Barack from her, but she knows Kelly was done with him by them. Kelly is a welcome addition to the Vicarious World team of wannabe writers. Read, and be merry. 

I still think about him. I still remember the way he looked at me when we first met and how he smiled at me. I remember how he wrote his phone number in ridiculously huge numbers on notebook paper so I wouldn’t forget or lose it. These were happier and more innocent times, before everyone had a cell phone and during the epitome of the internet boom. Even though we don’t speak at all now, I always find my life crossing paths with his. He and I got the same scar down our bellies from two different accidents in two very different parts of the world. He was riding his bicycle in Brooklyn and was struck by a car and ruptured his spleen. I was in Spain in the back seat of a car on my way to my grandma's house from the beach. Our car collided head on with another car. The impact was so forceful that it caused the seat belt I was wearing to make significant damage to my intestines. We both went through exploratory laparatomies within 3 months of each other, his accident being before mine. I found out about his accident after mine of course, I saw some pictures on his Facebook of him being in the hospital so I called him and we met up for oysters and beer and talked about how we could’ve died.

Saturday, October 1, 2011

Subjectivity by K.V. Sart

I have found it to be true that, at the end of the day, if you go to bed drunk, you will be happy with what you have accomplished.

Friday, September 30, 2011

*Vicarious World's Best of the Month*

At the conclusion of every month Vicarious World’s team of writers comes up with a totally arbitrary list of our top blog posts during that time. It is the crème de la crème of Vicarious World, the most noteworthy, thought-provoking 2-3 pages of literature (can we call it that?) that we present to you.
This month, our best of the month includes the safe way to get the youngsters involved in drugs, a surprisingly weak defense for the bad guys, two non-experts debating a semi-serious topic, and a couple of poems that you may want to read in total privacy. Here is the "Best of the Month."

Thursday, September 29, 2011

Oct-boner Baseball: Vicarious World's Official MLB Postseason Preview by Jersey Campbell

Tony Plush is looking to light one at the end of Oct-boner.

Disclaimer: this is about baseball, meaning this article will probably last three plus hours and you'll fall asleep at least twice during the middle paragraphs. Turn away now if you wish. 
Also, don’t take these predictions to the bank. I’m just a fan of baseball who watches "MLB Tonight" a lot.

Wednesday, September 28, 2011

NYC Robert:The Dating Scheme Upside Down

Many women are a lot more attractive in their prime (20-30years old), I’d say, then when they’re older. I know many of you can agree with that, but if you can’t just take a look out your window.

Tuesday, September 27, 2011

Politics Killed the Man of Reason by Jersey Campbell

                Politics. The process by which a group of people make collective decisions. Social relations involving authority or power. The methods and tactics used to formulate and apply policy. The activities associated with the governance of a country or area. The art or science concerned with guiding or influencing governmental policy, or winning and holding control over a government.
                There are a lot of things that dissatisfy me; waking up after 8:30, dealing with impatient people, people who have yet to convert to Tom Brady-anity (we’ve been waiting for Jesus to come back for something like 2,000 years, why can’t we realize that he has come back as #12 on the New England Patriots. Repent!). These trivial faults don’t bother me as much the idea of politics. 

Sunday, September 25, 2011

NYC Robert: How to Avoid "The Friend Zone"

The Friend Zone isn't a place you want to be if you're trying to pursue someone because your chances with them may be over.

Have you ever liked someone, but as you got to know them better you felt they'd be a better friend then significant other? By you having those feeling you just placed that person in the Friend Zone. My next question is have you ever been placed in the Friend Zone by someone you liked? If you have, don't be ashamed it happens all the time. Also, keep in mind you may have done it to someone yourself. The real reason for this post is to avoid the Friend Zone. So..if you have ever been placed in the Friend Zone, and don't want that to happen again keep reading.

Thursday, September 22, 2011

Billion Dollar Pimps and Million Dollar Hoes by Jersey Campbell

                I don’t have a favorite sport. Instead, I like to put them into tiers. Tier one is the NBA, MLB, and European Football (not that foolishness we like to call football that barely involves the ball interacting with the foot, but real football where the game is predicated on the ball's interaction with the foot). Tier two is the NFL, WTA Majors, NCAA Football, and NCAA Basketball. Tier three is any event Tiger Woods plays in and big-time boxing or UFC bouts. Tier “there’s no way you’ll ever catch me watching this” is WNBA basketball, BASS Fishing, and NHL Hockey, although I have found myself watching the Stanley Cup Playoffs over the recent years.

Tuesday, September 20, 2011

NYC Robert: The definition a "Date"

So here’s the truth about the meaning of a date…There isn’t one. Yeah you heard me. So the term ‘Date’ that many people have passed down from generation to generation is indeed false. But no worries, I’m going to set things right. First off let me say this there are two terms here Date and Date Date. Now let’s go to class.

Monday, September 19, 2011

Jersey Campbell's Youtube Video of the Day: The Raid

I'd like to introduce you to Vicarious World's newest running feature, the Youtube Video of the Day.

I'm supposed to be talking about real shit but sometimes I can't help myself. Today we get to take a look at the Indonesian hardcore action flick "The Raid" that's been getting a lot of buzz lately. After watching the trailer, you'll know why. That shit cra'!

It's about a team of 20 cops who have to infiltrate a 30-floor apartment complex filled with criminals and druglords. Their mission is to take out the Kingpin who lives in the penthouse on the top floor. From what I can tell, it looks like if the kung-fu movies we've been watching over the last half century or so were only caterpillars, and "The Raid" is is the butterfly they were destined to become, or something like that. That shit cra'. Peep. 

Sunday, September 18, 2011

Yahoo! Homepages for Homerooms

Yahoo! Homepages for Homerooms: Check out Yahoo! Homepages for Homerooms – it’s an easy, free way to help classrooms across the U.S. by simply making Yahoo! your homepage.

The Vicarious World blog stands behind helping children succeed to become tomorrow's leaders. What better way than giving public schools a helping hand by just making Yahoo your homepage. Yeah, that’s all, follow the link above and it will guide you through three easy steps. Let's help tomorrow's leaders make a difference. 

Friday, September 16, 2011

A peek inside the soul of a soulless man Pt. II: Rooting for the Bad Guy by Jersey Campbell

For Pt. I click here.

Do you remember what your college admittance essay was about? I don’t really care but it was an attention-grabbing way to start this article. I happened to have two of them. A lot of people advised me to scrap the first one because of the nature of what I wrote about. So I ended up writing about why I used a wicker basket usually reserved for fruit assortments as a bookbag for the majority of my senior year. Don’t ask.

Thursday, September 15, 2011

NYC Robert: They Never Texted, Called, or Emailed Me Back!

Is every one on one outing you go on with a new person or friend a date date? I say no. Two people can schedule a meet up and go to a place without it being a date. However, there is a lot of skepticism within that. In many cases one of the two people may feel it’s a date, and the other may not, or they both can think it’s a date, but they really aren’t sure so they ponder the thought. You see how weird this is. Why can’t two people just go somewhere without this thought in their minds?

Wednesday, September 14, 2011

The Toughness of Man by NYC Robert

The other day I was watching a movie called 127 Hours. It’s a true story about a guy who gets stuck in a cave. The movie starts off very calm and exciting; guy gets his equipment for the hike, meets some chicks, and gets invited to their party that evening. So I said to myself, “This movie is not too bad,” but I was still wondering when this guy would get stuck in a cave. After he exchanged numbers with the cuties and goes about his business the story then comes to light.

Walking tall, listening to some tunes, and having no care in the world is not a good thing to do when hiking through caves you aren’t familiar with. Well maybe I’m the only one who thinks that because this guy did exactly that. Until he came across a rock that was wedged in between two mountainous walls. I asked myself, "Why he doesn’t just walk around?" He stood there he thought for a while, stepped on the rock a few times to see if it was secure enough, and thought some more. In the end of his decision making, he decided to jump over it but the rock was not sturdy enough to hold him up. So now he’s falling, and so is that beach ball size of a rock. When he resumes a stationary position his right arm is wedged in between the rock, and the mountainous wall. I said, “Damn,” and asked myself, “How the hell is he going to get out?” He was alone, about twenty feet deep, and no one around for miles.

Monday, September 12, 2011

Jersey Campbell's Quote of the Day: Jiddu Krishnamurti

I'd like to introduce you to the quote of the day.
Our first entry comes from Jiddu Krishnamurti, who was a writer and speaker on philosophical and spiritual issues. A brother of mine introduced me a few months back (not literally, Krishnamurti passed about 25 years ago) and I've decided to pass it along. 

I'm all for enlightenment and the expansion of our understanding. I trust you'll meditate on these wise words

"When you call yourself an Indian or a Muslim or a Christian or a European, or anything else, you are being violent. Do you see why it is violent? Because you are separating yourself from the rest of mankind. When you separate yourself by belief, by nationality, by tradition, it breeds violence. So a man who is seeking to understand violence does not belong to any country, to any religion, to any political party or partial system; he is concerned with the total understanding of mankind."
- Jiddu Krishnamurti

Bonus material: "The Real Revolution," 1966 speech from Jiddu Krishnamurti. Everything that was said in this speech then can be applied to the human condition today. 

Friday, September 9, 2011

*Special to Vicarious World* Should you get married? Pt 2. Jersey Campbell and NYC Robert

If you missed Part 1 click here.
Apparently jumping over these
things means a lot

We continue with our friendly discussion on life, love, and jumping the broom.

Jersey Campbell:
Sorry that I didn't know about a 16th century wedding tradition from Wales. Shoulda caught up on my British history before having this conversation, that's my mistake. 
If you can't prove to me that true love exists then I have no reason to believe in it. It's simple logic- I cannot prove a negative claim, the positive must be confirmed. 
I'm just gonna keep throwing scenarios at you and watch you duck and dodge while never confronting. A happy marriage doesn't necessarily mean true love is involved. Maybe those two people are extremely compatible. Maybe one of them have mastered the art of seduction and can get any partner to love them. Maybe they "settled" and found that their partner isn't so bad after all. How are we supposed to know? There are so many people in this world- seven billion and counting- I find it hard to believe that only ONE can be right for you. It's totally possible that your personality and body type totally fit with another personality and body type so that you're predispositioned to have crazy, hormonally charged feelings towards them. It ain't some otherworldly connection that you were destined to have from you were born. Please. 
That's why it should be OK for one's partner to explore other options. If you limit yourself to one person for your whole life you'll never know what else is out there. The smart consumer shops around before settling on a purchase and even then they always keep the receipt. The problem is people aren't products and emotions are easily hurt, I'll give you that. But my point is that no one partner is perfect, and the dissatisfaction will always arise. Whether you can handle it is based not on love, but a crapload of other emotions and rationales that we have lazily (or brilliantly, depending on your opinion) defined as love. 
I'm also curious to know your sentiments on homos (fuck off, that's not a derogatory term. If you're a man and you only like men you're a homo. If you're a woman and you only like woman you're a homo. It's a scientific term. That's like telling me I can't call someone from Argentina an Argentinian.) and bis. But I fear that we'd be overstepping the parameters of this discussion. Maybe another time brother.

NYC Robert:
You don’t want to believe then fine, but tell me how many people believe in things they can’t prove?  If you ask me, I’d say lots actually. One main belief is God. How many people can say that they’ve actually seen him? Not a lot, but yet millions believe in his existence. So it’s not really farfetched to believe true love and marriage can work. Why? Because not many people know marriages that are perfect, but yet it is said that everyone has a true love. Isn’t it a bit mysterious that that saying is still going around today? I think so. If you want to be a wild man and assume it doesn’t exist then fine, do that.  Ask yourself this though- have you tried to find true love, or do you just assume it’s not possible?

If you’re fine with your significant other dating others then OK. But I don’t think you two are in an actual relationship, and according to you what’s the point of people titling their relationship, by saying we’re dating, serious, or engaged? In the end that person will get you so annoyed and frustrated you won’t want to be around them. It’s kind of interesting that you think this way. It’s very similar to the book of Solomon and his wise thinking of not laying with various women for moments of pleasure, or keeping their company just for mere enjoyment. Because in the end they don't help you and you probably don't care about them.  So with the thought of Solomon, if you want to explore then explore, but you shouldn’t need a relationship to tell you you’re not with the right person.  Instead, you should meet people without a relationship, and that will guide you to know what you want in, and from a relationship.

You also mention homos, why? I don’t know. We aren’t discussing who should get married, we're discussing if we need to get married. Love is love, it’s not my place to judge who should, or shouldn’t be married. And as I mentioned before if you believe that there is a person out there for you go and find them. Don’t be a person who thinks financial stability will settle everything. True happiness doesn’t need to be rich. In fact I’d take a mediocre life, a house, a wife, children, and Love over being extremely rich and miserable any day of the week.   

*Special to Vicarious World* A friendly discussion: Should you get married? Pt I. Jersey Campbell and NYC Robert

Today we bring to you a Vicarious World Special: Should you get married? 

Two of our writers, Jersey Campbell and NYC Robert, rip each other apart trying to get to the bottom of this not-so-important question. None of them propose to be experts on marriage (sorry Rob, I take that back) but we thought it would be fun to see where this discussion would take them. 

Read and enjoy. And leave a comment or two, we'd like to see what other people think about this. 

Jersey Campbell: 
Honesty is the best policy, but evidently dishonesty is in a close second. I'll admit I disagree with about 100% of what you say in your posts and I can no longer sit aside and let you ramble on about relationships and not air my opinions. This will be the first and last time I will write about relationships extensively on this blog. 
Nobody "needs" to get married. Aside from the extensive legal and psychological effects of being legally bound to your partner marriage is not essential. If you love someone why do you need the church or the state to confirm it? Besides, getting married is like handcuffing your life to someone else, and we already know how generally undependable people are. Then if things don't work out you gotta get your lawyer involved and go through the whole divorce process, who wants to do all that?
I'm not anti-relationship or anti-marriage, I just think we should think long and hard before you take that oath to be with this person for the rest of your life. Your LIFE. I don't care if their a 20, 80, 55, 12.93, 79 1/2, or 101. Even if you're 100 percent sure that this is the one (and even if you are sure, you're probably wrong) there is a chance that you might not be the one for them. I don't even believe that we have "soulmates." That's like Plato rambling on about perfect beauty and perfect justice. That shit don't exist. Let's not kid ourselves. 

NYC Robert:                                                                                                                                         Do we need to get married? Many people, in fact, lots of people say “NO." They don’t understand the need to get married or to find their true soul mate. Some don’t think it even exists. Well Mr. Campbell, I’m here to tell you that people should get married, and that everyone- yes everyone- has a soul mate.

How many people actually venture to find their true soul mate? If you ask me? not too many. Too many people settle for what’s around them. For example going to a bar, club, church, library, coffee shop, or any other place that suites what they like, or think they like, nearby. What if your true soul mate was in another town, state, or country? I feel that a major problem with people finding true love is the society we live in. Our society is based on capital. As a result people get so wound up in their careers, and not living life, exploring the world, or taking the time to find true love.  I also know in this world now it’s hard for anyone to say I’m going out to find true love and just drop everything on a wimb.

It’s obvious by now that finding true love isn’t easy, but it is possible. Well if you believe that then you’ve probably heard this saying too, “Nothing is easy.” If you really want to find true love then do it. Don’t settle for anyone just cause, because in the end you’re going to be unhappy with yourself, life, and have hatred towards the other person.

I know finding your true soul mate isn’t the act of jumping the broom. However, I do feel that when you find that person, your other half, then getting married wont’ feel like an obligation. So don’t bitch and moan that marriage doesn’t work when you seek enjoyment from the same type of people, and you don’t even feel that isn’t your true soul mate. 

Thursday, September 8, 2011

At The Table by K.V. Sart

              The evening meal was spread upon the table.  A great slab of meatloaf and a bowl of cooked green beans.  There was enough to feed a family of five, but only two sat at the table. 
Margret was always making more food than she or Rick could eat.  It was a habit she had acquired from her mother, though her mother had had seven mouths to feed.  Rick would always jokingly ask Margret what she was practicing for.  Always he saw the hurt in her eyes when he said this.
Margret was unable to bear children.  The two had been trying for the entirety of their marriage.  They had visited every fertility doctor they could find.  All had said the same thing; that it was Margret who was infertile, and none of them had a solution to the problem.
The two drank red wine and discussed the day’s happenings.  Rick worked as a paralegal in a law office, and Margret was a home care nurse for a woman with Alzheimer’s disease.  Margret spoke of how the woman was getting worse everyday, and soon she would be permanently bed ridden.  The woman’s family wished for Margret to move into the house when this happened or else they would find a different nurse.  The family lived many hundreds of miles away, and could not look after the woman themselves.

NYC Robert: Good Afternoon Gorgeous

It’s Sunny.

I’ve spotted her looking out the balcony.
As I gazed at her posterior figure, I slowly worked my way up her body with my eyes.I stared at her caves as if I were hypnotized. They looked so smooth like ripe plum skin.I thought ripe because that’s when fruit is ready to be eaten. Yes, I thought, the chance to finally take that smooth, soft, woman and do what needs to be done, and not let her spoil.I continued to stare in my hypnosis, and slowly worked my way higher.Her day blouse had been covering her soft legs, plump ass, and elegant back; however that didn’t stop my wondrous mind. I imagined the back of her thighs to be as suave as looking at tropical ocean water.Its appearance is mesmerizing.  As I thought more of those soft legs, I knew her plump ass would follow a similar, but more detailed expression, maybe like a ripe plum.Its midline would represent the soft two halves. I wanted to touch and squeeze that ass with my masculine, but yet gentle hands, I did not. I continued up, and now was at her back. I imagined it to be smooth, soft, and angelic. Angelic because of the shape it had. I thought if she were an actual angel then she could wrap me with her wings as I did her in my arms. And we could hold each other, and tighten our bond with the essence of the intimate encounter that was yet to come. That moment could share more intimacy then twenty years of intimate love because we would hold each other deeply; her wings around the two of us, and my penis inside her vagina. She would wrap tighter and tighter, as a sign for me to go deeper, and deeper. I continued up this angelic woman. I was back to her actual skin, and I looked at her scapula’s, smooth neck, and listened to the whistle of the ocean. It was like she was calling me, but to do more than just hold her. I could no longer continue to stare, and be hypnotized because she now has felt my presence, and I was now only two feet away. As she faced me I noticed her gorgeous eyes, soft lips, and the elegance of her beauty. No words were crossed between us, and before I knew it, we had kissed. We kissed and kissed, and in the background I could hear the waves of the ocean clashing stronger and stronger. As they grew stronger so did the passion in our kiss, and one by one the buttons on her blouse began to pop off.  Her blouse was almost off, but the waves had slowed down, and so did I. I felt that moment we just shared was a perfect way to say good afternoon. 

Wednesday, September 7, 2011

NYC Robert: Good Morning Beautiful

Its quiet.
I’m laying in bed next to a soft, angelic, women.
As she lies in my arms, I begin caressing her hair, which probably would  feel like a cloud; if it were touchable. Clouds appear soft, graceful, and angelic.
The indulgence of her hair is something you could touch for hours, as I did.
Soon, the sun began to rise, which made her twist and turn in my arms, so she shunned her eye lids from the light. I glanced lower towards her eye lids, and although they were shut, it was as if I could still see her looking right at me. So I gazed at them, while holding her ever so gently in my masculine arms.
The sun rose higher, and she twisted and turned in my arms. As her head propped higher I noticed her thin, pink lips, which appeared to be pouting towards me, and as I looked back at her eye lids, I knew she wanted a kiss. I thought of that mutual bond we had, and the affection we had for one another, rendering that thought, I too pouted forward. As I moved gracefully towards her waiting for that angelic touch of her soft, gentle, touch of her lips. I began to feel her heart beating, faster, and faster as I moved her closer. While at the same time my heart began beating faster as well, and it wasn’t long before I only felt one beat, and heard one sound. We were connected, and had felt the same passion for one another. What better now, than to seal the excitement within ourselves with a kiss. As my arms wrapped further and further around her, I knew our pituitary glands had stimulated our bodies for the desire of an intimate moment. Our lips had finally touched. We held our lips in a stationary position enjoying every moment of it. The  sensation it was sending down my spinal cord made me want to kiss more, and as our noses touched we smiled, and kissed some more. The mere moment of this angelic kiss was pleasurable, compassionate, and an elegant way to say good morning.

Sunday, September 4, 2011

A Modest Swiftian Proposal Concerning Drug Education by K.V. Sart

The Vicarious World Blog would like to introduce K.V. Sart. Mr. Sart will be a regular on Vicarious World. He's insightful, humorous, and is known to tussle with black bears out in the Appalachian Mountains. He is also The Most Interesting Man in the World's primary adviser. 
Read, and be merry.

It is within the soul that the individual finds their place in existence. Career choices, living arrangements, clothing fashions, all of them products of the human rationale, bound to the limits of environment and society. Where does true meaning come from, in the realest sense?

Often for those living on the fringe of society, psychoactive substances take the place of emotional connection and societal acceptance. For some, the search for meaning has been replaced by artificial brain stimulation.  I am often struck by the sincerest and unapologetic misuse of substances by my generation. Boredom and a severe lack of knowledge seems the culprit. We must educate the youth in matters of proper timing and place for inebriation. We have all known the embarrassment of taking blues in a party setting, passing out on a couch with our shoes on, only to be written on with a black sharpie pen, and going into work the next day with fallacies printed around our mouths. Such a situation is the equivalent of attempting to hammer in a nail with a screwdriver; both, at their core essence do a similar job, but the situation itself dictates the tool.

It is too easy to simply say no one should ever take drugs; history has proven many times over that this does not work. The usefulness of particular substances for certain occasions is too great to ignore. Instead, an alteration in the attitudes towards drugs and drug use is needed.

Drug education, and drug prohibition in general, has not worked. It has become the policy of educators to lie to children about substance use. Let us take a moment to analyze this phenomenon.

Death Note, Kick-Ass, and Batman. Fighting for a cause, by Jersey Campbell

Light Yagami found his voice.
               An innocuous book labeled “Death Note” sat in the grass outside of his classroom. Unnoticed and untouched. Curiosity killed the cat, it empowered Light Yagami. Sparing you all a 15,000 word run-down of the Japanese amine series “Death Note,” I will only detail Yagami’s path to ascension and his inevitable -and slightly, no, seriously incomprehensible and damn near impossible- downfall.
                You have probably already said to yourself, “OK this guy is talking about animes now,” (anime being the Japanese abbreviation for animation), “it’s time for me to turn around and slowly walk away from this blog.” STOP.  This is more than me confessing my love for oversized, beady cartoon eyes and exaggerated expressions. And this show isn’t Dragon Ball Z or Pokémon. It is a surprisingly deep and sadistic tale of a young man who by chance became the pseudo-God of the world. Even the United States President had no choice but to recognize and adhere to his power.
                Warning: it’s about to get a little super-natural in here. The Death Note is a notebook that has the power to kill anyone whose name is written in it. 40 seconds after a name is written that person will die of a heart attack. The note can also control how a person dies. If you detail the events leading up to the person’s death it will happen exactly as you described. Follow me? There are a few other rules regarding the use of the Death Note but these are the most important.