Is every one on one outing you go on with a new person or friend a date date? I say no. Two people can schedule a meet up and go to a place without it being a date. However, there is a lot of skepticism within that. In many cases one of the two people may feel it’s a date, and the other may not, or they both can think it’s a date, but they really aren’t sure so they ponder the thought. You see how weird this is. Why can’t two people just go somewhere without this thought in their minds?
Let’s change this up some more. Say one out of the two people about to go on that date sees the other person as a friend. Then there shouldn't be much harm. How many people just go out with their friend? A lot actually. If you have a friend that you can never go out with one on one then what kind of friendship do you have? Some may say the real stickiness in this is that the person isn’t your friend yet, but the real stickiness is assuming every outing you go on is a date date. Why can’t people relax? A lot of the people who say that every outing is a date date contradict themselves. How? Because they then turn around and say take it day by day. So if that’s the case then whether or not it was a date date shouldn't matter? Were you two going to be in a relationship? According to your principle you'd be thinking too far in the future. Now back to this outing. So if the skepticism is all out of your head by now, you should be thinking that your date is just an outing and nothing more. But the real reason for this discussion is why the person never contacted you back. There can be dozens and dozens of reasons why, but let's not go crazy and say the person died. Come on people let's think good thoughts. But I just think a person not contacting you back is a bit childish and immature. And if you doubt me because you think telling the person, "I had a nice time but I'm not really interested in seeing you again," is difficult (your reasons can be you think they are crazy, or may do something wild to you), then what difference would it make if you never contact them back? Regardless, they’re going to get the same effect. I just feel you should contact them back, even if you aren’t interested in talking to them for whatever reason. Don’t be an immature individual that thinks your words are going to be too much for the other person to handle. It just goes to show your baby bottle is still full.
If this has ever happened to you tell me about your story. And let me tell you that you lucked out with that person never contacting you back. A person who doesn’t contact someone back for whatever reason not including major tragedies isn’t really much of a caring person. They basically said, "You’re dead to me."
My personal statement. If you think that your words will truly hurt someone then you obviously think too highly of yourself. Honestly it’s just words. Don’t be so immature, and also don’t assume everyone you go on a date with is looking to get with you. Really, what makes you so special?
You may have to explain the difference between a date and a DATE DATE. In our culture if a man asks for a woman to go out with him or vice versa it will always be considered a date unless specified before they went out.
ReplyDelete@Jersey. Check my next post it's title The Difference Between a Date and a Date Date. It will be up very soon.
ReplyDeleteThis is a good topic. I think the not contacting after the was-it-a-date-or-a-DATE-DATE? is somewhat of a cop-out, but I understand it. Some people don't want to hurt others feelings upfront. They'd rather let them draw conclusions (which is hell on Earth). In the past when I've told a man that I wasn't interested, he pursued me more. So, not saying anything proved to work...even if it made me feel icky inside.
ReplyDeleteFrom a female perspective, I wouldn't mind if a guy said "Hey, you're cool but...I'm not interested." I'd be hurt, but...better to know upfront than wondering why he hasn't called.
@Shay. There are people out there who don't take "not interested" very well, especially men. But that's nature or should I say people always want what they can't have. Hopefully it's harmless though.
ReplyDeleteThanks for checking my blog.